In December 2017 Virtual Wombat completed its metamorphosis into a totally awesome Webcomic.

It now lives at where all future updates will be found. I'm leaving the rest of this content here for anyone who wants to read it but will now permanently redirect to the new website.

Thanks to everyone who supported my initial blogging journey, it gave me the education I needed to get my comic launched.


Being Absolutely Rubbish at Gaming – And Wishing I Wasn’t

Despite being a pretty keen gamer, unfortunately I’m actually a bit crap. I’ve decided to write a bit about the reasons (excuses) for being rubbish at gaming, the guy that plays everything on very easy mode.

The one that wipes the raid for standing in the fire. Actually, if there was a super duper mega easy mode, I’d be the one playing that too.

I’m Rubbish at Gaming Because I Don’t have Time

Rubbish at Gaming

Over the past four weeks I’ve spent exactly five hours playing games on the Xbox. Rare Replay was the focus of all that time, which I wrote a bit about here. There was a time when I would spend at least a couple of hours a night gaming.

What changed? I had to start adulting. Parenthood, career pressures and feeling that I was neglecting other hobbies all contributed to the reduction in gaming time.

I used to really enjoy playing MMORPGs like World of Warcraft and ESO. Now I simply don’t have time to keep up with everyone! The few hours a week I can find, almost seem wasted in a game where all I’d be doing is trailing behind everyone else.

Because of this, I’ve left the online stuff in the past. Any game I play these days is guaranteed to be single player and story driven. If there’s an easy mode, I’ll be using it.

I’m Rubbish at Gaming Because I Have the Reflexes of a Slug

Rubbish at Gaming

Don’t stand in the fire! What fire? Wipe and then kick. Yeah, I have no reservations at this point in admitting I am and likely always will be a noob.

Throw a cricket ball at me in real life and it will hit me squarely between the eyes. My reflexes are so bad that it would probably take a few seconds after impact for me to realise I’d been hit. Then fall over.

My brain doesn’t handle gaming very well. My fingers refuse to hit the correct buttons. Sit me in front of a PC with all the shortcuts and macros set up, gaming mouse ready to use and watch the disaster unfold.

Never ask me to jump across a chasm. I will certainly end up a mess of splatted viscera at the bottom.

Hello Easy Mode my Old Friend

I think in what limited time I do have, I’ll be happy to carry on playing on easy. I bought one of the Dark Souls games in a Steam sale a short while ago. It scarred me for life.

Got any tips for a hopelessly bad player?

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2 thoughts on “Being Absolutely Rubbish at Gaming – And Wishing I Wasn’t

  1. Not a tip as so much but I totally get what you mean about having limited time to play thus falling behind, I’ve cancelled my WoW sub because of lack of time.

    One tip that I used to use is to look on Elitist Jerks and find the best DPS rota for my spec and then put the spells in order of rotation if you get me?

    • I definitely do know what you mean Kayleigh, I used to go on Icy Veins for WoW. Then set up action bars etc. accordingly. Just not worth paying a tenner a month anymore for the few hours here and there I’d get to play.

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